Posted by: Hannah | 07/21/2010

20,000 leagues under the sea

I complain sometimes about where I live.  I love my house but the noisy urban rednecks next door are an annoyance.  (One night this week we had to close the kids’ bedroom windows despite the 29 degree heat and 85% humidity because they were complaining about the “weird smell”.  No, it wasn’t pot – it was Axe body spray.  Did you know that under those conditions, the smell of three shirtless men in their early 20s will actually waft all the way across the yard, through the second-floor window, and into your nose?  It’s true.  That stuff is potent.  Doesn’t make me horny, though. I guess it doesn’t work).

Anyway, I do wish I lived further away from the busy road, and that there were more young kids nearby.  But there are some great things about this area too, and one is the lake just a quick jaunt up the road.

During this unrelenting heat, the boys and I have been going swimming every morning – nice and early, before it gets really hot and the lake is too crowded.  It’s been great.  Thing # 1 is a good swimmer.  Thing # 2 thinks he is.  He squats low in the water, waves his arms back and forth, and crows “I sweeming! I sweeming!” at the top of his lungs.  We stay until we’re freezing cold, lips purple, fingers and toes wrinkled – it helps keep us comfortable for the rest of the day.

I’ve totally lost any self-consciousness I had about wearing a bathing suit.  During yesterday’s swim, I was surrounded by small children, all wanting to splash and be held up while they floated.  There was only one other mom in the water.  Every other one was perched on shore, wearing long shorts, dark shirts, sunglasses, floppy-brimmed hats.  One little boy said “I like your bathing suit.  My mommy doesn’t have a bathing suit.  Watch me do my back starfish!!”  and then he rolled over on his back, sticking his feet way up in the air while his head slowly sank below the water.

Shortly afterward, Thing # 2 threw his arms around me and yelled “I wuv you mama!” And then Thing # 1 said thank you for taking them swimming.

I can’t stop thinking about all the fun I’d be missing, if I were sitting on the shore covering up my fat bits. Or sitting in an office while someone else spends this time with my kids.  Yes, I wish I was svelte and had no stretch marks.  Yes, I wish sometimes I could have a nice wardrobe, professionally-coloured hair, and lunch meetings.  But when I really calm down and think about it, I have the life I always wanted.



  1. i like this a lot.

    a LOT.

    ie, i need to stuff my ass into that ill-fitting bathing suit more often. thank you.

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