Posted by: Hannah | 08/29/2011

blogging the Wish Book – pt 2

I am not the only one who is obsessed with the Wish Book and its importance to the Canadian diaspora (are we a diaspora? am I using that word correctly?) I loved everyone’s stories and comments on the last post, and on Twitter. And tomorrow on CBC’s call-in show Maritime Noon, the topic is “memories of the Xmas Wish Book”.

It’s a thing. At least I can say I was slightly ahead of the curve.

Since my last post, both front and back covers have fallen off… I’ve put the book on top of the fridge twice because The Things had screaming fights about whose turn it was to look at it next… and I’ve heard that Thing #1 wants to do all of his shopping out of it because “it has something that everyone I know would like!”

Ah, the siren song of catalogue shopping.

This post – more gifts from the “gifts under” section.

Gifts Under $25

NHL iPhone skin with built-in bottle opener. Digest that for a minute. I do not have an iPhone, nor am I hockey fan, and I’ve never been to an NHL game… but I’ll bet that if one were to attend one, it would be quite the thing to stop Tweeting right in the middle of the game to flip your phone over and use it open a bottle of beer. Best thing ever. (p 50)

Faux Fur Steering Wheel Cover. This is such a Canadian thing – and actually quite useful, because if you need to drive somewhere during the winter months before your car has warmed up that freakin’ steering wheel is COLD. And unless you have leather driving gloves, you can’t wear anything on your hands to keep them warm because they will slip on the icy vinyl. I actually bought one of these for my mom one year and she loved it. Side note: why is it shown on a steering wheel for a BMW? Don’t expensive cars like that have heated steering wheels? Or at least ones with some kind of soft padding that doesn’t feel like a frozen wheel of death? (p 51)

NHL Blanket Wrap. What they are talking about here, people, is a Snuggie. A man-Snuggie. With an NHL team logo on the front. Which is not so bad, I guess, but what makes this noteworthy is the picture. Go look. I’ll wait. (p 57)

Gifts Under $30

There is only one item in this section worth mentioning. It is the ugliest thing I ever seen. I am trying to think who would buy these hideous things. I can’t. People, I give you Tender Tootsies Bootie Slippers for Women. They are velour-lined boots? slippers? cut-rate mukluks? They are bedecked with what I think are glass buttons but they could be metal. They come in black or white. I have this horrible feeling the kids may want to buy me these ungodly things. I am contemplating ripping out the page so they can’t order them for me. (p 62)

Gifts Under $40

“Purr” by Katy Perry Eau de Parfum. Um… Katy Perry has her own fragrance? In a purple glass bottle shaped like a cat? I am so out of the loop. (p 70)

Gifts Under $50

Jr. Beanbag Chair – in yellow, blue, or pink. Ah-hah! Now, here’s one of those things I remember from when I was a kid. I really, really wanted one. They just looked so comfortable. But every Xmas I’d mention it to my mom, and she’d say “well, if that’s what you want more than anything else, you can ask for one. But they’re pretty expensive and if you get one of those, that will be your gift from dad & I.” I never wanted one badly enough to forgo all other potential gift items – and I certainly wasn’t going to ‘waste’ my Santa gift on a chair – but as an adult I still say it would have been neat. They still show them with a kid curled up reading. *slow clap* That’s good marketing, Sears. You may get me yet. (p 74)

Gifts Under $75

‘Mountain Noel’ bedding (note: there should be an umlaut over the “e” in Noel). Does anyone ever really spend money buying Xmas-themed bedding? Would you? Even if you can reverse the cotton, Xmas side to the polyester-cotton plain side? (in other words, flipping your comforter over to the synthetic bit). Also, false advertising! If you buy the set you get a quilt and two shams for $74.99 BUT if you also want the matching neck roll ($29.99), the small accent cushion ($29.99) and the large accent cushion ($29.99) as illustrated you are way over the $75 cap. Uncool, Sears, you matchy-matchy bedding-pushing jerks. (p 76)

Gifts Under $100

Coca-Cola Can Fridge. It’s a fridge. It’s shaped like a Coke can. It holds eight cans or two 2L bottles. If I had a rec room, I would probably buy one. It’s silly and pointless and tiny (eight cans? but a case holds twelve cans… what do I do with the superfluous cans?) but it’s so wonderfully tacky and awful, I kind of love it a little.

***

I am skipping the rest of the “gifts under” section, because frankly the dollar values are getting silly… and I don’t want to bore myself or anyone else before I get to the jewelry! and the decor! and the toys!!!

 

 

 

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Responses

  1. I assume that Katy Perry’s perfume smells like low self-esteem, attention-seeking behaviour and a husband who wears too-tight-trousers. Also: gardenias!

  2. Ha! I was looking a at magazine in the grocery line the other day and saw a one page ad for her kitty shaped perfume. Then a masculin ad for Gucci men. Then the piece de resistance: A pink flower bottle of Justin Beiber perfume.

  3. Christmas themed bedding – that’s worse than Christmas themed handtowels. Although my MIL would probably enjoy it. She has a whole set of Christmas dishes, and they are super tacky but she brings them out at Christmas and is subsequently very satisfied with them. She shows them to everyone – “Don’t you just LOVE my Christmas dishes?” Also, I think the beer opener is a VERY good idea. That may be the best idea ever.

  4. Got mine this morning! SQuee! They have go-karts. The girls just might get those this year… 😀

    and ugh…the royal doulton section has some doozies….


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