Posted by: Hannah | 09/06/2012

drive the porcelain bus

Next week is Potty Training Week. I pretty much use NotMaryP’s method, described here. It works!

This was prompted by Louis’ mom, who thinks he’s ready to start using the toilet. I like his mom a lot; if we weren’t in a business relationship I’d say there’s a pretty good chance we’d be friends. I think she’s a great, relaxed, fun mom.

In this case I also think she’s completely delusional.

Louis couldn’t care less if he is wet. He could be soaking (and often is, he’s got massive bladder capacity), and if I say “hey buddy, time for a dry diaper?” he will deny being wet. Every time. Ditto with poo. In fact worse with poo – when caught with a load in his shorts, he will outright deny that it was him, even though he has the vilest poos known to man and there is no mistaking it.

He shows zero interest in the potty. He has never once tried to remove his own pants. I don’t even know if he quite understands where poo and pee comes from or how it gets in his fancy, horribly-expensive Lightning MacQueen-branded Pull-Ups.

I predict that next week he will dirty approximately 6 million pairs of underwear, get maybe two or three Smarties in five days, and be back in Pull-Ups by Saturday.

But anyway, she wants to try and I said I would give it five days. I also spoke to Pixie’s mom about training them both together, because I think Pixie is ready. She knows when she needs a clean diaper, and demands one right away. She is fascinated with the potty. She wants very much to be a ‘big girl’ and she knows darn well that Luna already wears underwear, so the peer pressure factor is there, too.

Second prediction – she’ll have it pretty much down by the weekend and we should be well on our way within a couple of weeks.

We’ll see.



  1. Enjoy! Hopefully at the end of the week you will have one less diaper to change!

  2. Potty training is the worst. THE WORST. And yes, I haven’t gone through teenage angst and I’m sure that’s pretty awful, but PEE AND POOP EVERYWHERE is terrible.

    • Oh, and it is going to be everywhere, too – discovered this afternoon that Louis’ parents haven’t even taught him how to take down and pull up his own pants yet. HE IS TWO AND A HALF, PEOPLE. I told his dad at pick up time that they would need to practice with him over the weekend because if he can’t even remove his own underpants, this little experiment of theirs is NOT going to work. And will just frustrate me and discourage him. GAAAA PARENTS.

  3. Along with the Smarties, you’re going to lay in extra chocolate for yourself too, right? And vodka?

    • Vodka’s in the freezer, Godiva chocolate bar hiding in the china hutch. I’m as ready as I’m gonna get. :p

  4. Wow. You are a brave woman — do you get danger-pay for taking on these kinds of duties?

    • Well… sometimes I get nice Christmas presents. :p Odd fact – the nicest gift I ever got from a client was from Marie’s parents, even though she was only here for four months and it was a really bad fit right from day one.

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