Today we went for breakfast at a restaurant, baked muffins, decorated the gingerbread house, and took the dog for a ramble in the woods while big fluffy Christmas-movie snowflakes fell. Joking around as I bundled everybody back into the van I said “wow, we’ve done a lot today! I’m FunMommy when I don’t have all those extra kids to worry about!” To which Harry replied “yeah, then you’re AngryMommy”.
I realize that through the week I am more abrupt and less likely to just drop everything to have fun, because I’m too busy with The Business of Running the Family™. And I don’t see that changing anytime soon, because there are just so many things to keep track of, so many individual bits & pieces that go into making sure everyone is clothed, fed, and where they need to be when they need to be there.
In fact I bust my ass Monday to Friday so that on the weekends I can relax and play.
I’d like to say I had no idea that my intensity through the week was coming across as anger, but that would be dishonest. I worried that it did, but no one ever mentioned it so I figured I was getting away with it.
I have to be more mindful. Even when it’s hard, I have to try.