But this week! Oh, this week. The over-sharing started up again with a vengeance.
The kids got on the bus and I started hurrying back to the house because it was cold as a brass monkey’s balls again. “Have a good one!” I tossed back over my shoulder. “Yeah, I think I’ll go to my mom’s today” said OSN. “Have fun!” I replied, because I’m an IDIOT WHO NEVER LEARNS. “Well, I’m just going to get out of the house. Husband is leaving me” came flying back at me.
Now, the sensible thing to do would have been to just keep running, but when you know you have to see this person twice a day every day until all of our kids are out of elementary school, that’s not always a practical option. So I stopped.
“We had a HUGE fight last night. And of course HE insisted on doing it in front of the kids. (They are 2 and 7, for the record). And I said I wanted to BE SOMETHING TO SOMEBODY. But that I don’t want to be his mother. And I’m not cutting up his meat for him anymore. (aside: what the fuck?) And that I’m not happy. So he said “fine, I’ll leave”.
I just stood there nodding. Then a little glimmer of hope gleamed in my brain. “So, will you be staying in the house, then? It’s a rental, right?”
“Oh, I’m staying! I need a yard for my dog!” [pause pause] “Oh, and of course 7yo needs to go to school.”
“Well, um, drive safe if you go to your mom’s. The roads are pretty icy today.” AND THEN I RAN FOR IT.
“I didn’t go to my mom’s. I stayed home and cleaned because we have company coming tonight”.
Now, I’d heard all about the company ad nauseam for weeks. Husband’s brother has a terminal illness and only months to live. He, his wife, and their two adult children were coming for a good-bye visit. (Please don’t ask why they were making the sick one travel. I have no idea and I’m sure it’s a balls-stupid reason, anyway).
But don’t you think, if you had months left of your life, that you would not want to spend five days of it trapped in a tiny house, in February, with five adults and two rambunctious children – and a dog – while a relationship was breaking apart? I’m guessing that’s not on anyone’s bucket list.
“They’re still coming?” I said, stupidly.
“Oh yes, everything’s all arranged, and I spent the whole day cleaning and washing bedding while Husband whined that I was blocking the TV. Also, he says since I’m the one who’s unhappy, that I should leave, not him.”
Again, I just stood there with my mouth open ever so slightly while all this washed over me. I’ve tried many times telling her these things are none of my business, but that never stops her.
Then the bus came, mercifully. Her son got off clutching a piece of paper. The wind was howling. It blew right out of his hands – we all chased it (well, except her) but it was gone. The heartbroken sobbing that followed this was clearly not just about the paper.
Not a word about any of it. Not a peep. Instead she’s switched to worrying about the weather, because she works the night shift and she’s scheduled to be driving home after the snow has started falling. Not a whisper about dramatic fights, anyone leaving anyone – none of it.
I honestly think these two will stay together because neither one of them will actually bestir themselves to leave. On an almost daily basis for two years now she’s told me how unhappy she is… what an asshole he is… how her kids are her “first priority” but that they routinely fight in front of them.
It all just makes me tired. I wish to Christ they would just go away. I feel bad for the kids but those two idiots? They deserve each other.