I’ve been eavesdropping on the dayhome kids a lot lately, because now that Daisy is finally getting enough words to hold up a conversation I’m not needed to intervene and translate quite so much.
Kids can teach us about many complex and thought-provoking issues, such as:
On Human Reproduction
Louis: When my brother was born, he was big. So big. THE BIGGEST BABY IN THE WORLD. And he was so big, he couldn’t fit in my mom anymore, so then the doctor put him in my dad, and then when he was all done being the biggest baby in the world he came out POP.
Pixie: Louis, daddies don’t grow babies in their tummies. Only mommies do that.
Louis: NO! Girls grow in their mommies. Boys grow in their daddies. And then they come out of your BUM.
On Gender Politics
Louis: I am BATMAN.
Pixie: I am Batman, too!
Louis: You can’t be Batman. GIRLS CAN’T BE BATMAN.
Pixie: Girls can be Batman! Girls can be Superman! An’ girls can be mermaids! See? This is my mermaid tail. *falls to the floor, kicks feet*
George: We are makin’ muffins. We are makin’ muffins, Daisy. An’ we need da blue muffin cups. Blue muffins are da best.
Daisy: My yike red.
George: You kin have red an’ I wiw have blue.
On Reaching Life’s Milestones
Pixie: I’m almos’ four.
Louis: I’m already four.
Pixie: After I’m four I’m gonna be FIVE.
Louis: I’m already four and then I’m gonna be five and then I’m gonna DRIVE A CAR.
On Preparing for Winter
Pixie: I’m going up a winter mountain.
Me: Oh, yes?
Pixie: I’m wearin’ a blanket on my shoulders. An’ a scarf. An’ a hat. An’ you kin pretend I’m wearin’ special boots.
Me: OK, I will. Those boots look nice and warm.
Pixie: Yes they are. Here I go! Up to a winter mountain! There is an ice monster! *disappears into the hallway*
Me: Hey, Pixie? Did you see Frozen this weekend?
Pixie: Yes I did! You need to dress warm so you don’t freeze!
Daisy: Whea’s mah BAHBEE??
Me: You mean the baby doll? I’m not sure, honey. Where did you put her?
Daisy: YOU FINE MAH BAHBEE!!!
Me: Or, you could go look in the playroom and see if you left her there.
Daisy: *goes into playroom, finds baby immediately* DEAH YOU AAAH! COME HEAH, BAHBEE! *stuffs baby into backpack*
On Earning a Living
Louis: My dad is at work. And my mom is at work.
Pixie: My mom and dad are at work, too.
George: My dad works inna office!
Daisy: Mommy an’ Daddy ah WORKIN’!
Pixie: And Hannah is working too. Her job is buckling car seats.