March is over for another year.
Today the air is mild-ish, the sky is blue and cloudless, and enough of the ice has melted out of my driveway that I can see how much the frost heave has changed the topography.
I’ll take it.
Pulling myself up out of a despondency spiral is agonizing, and the progress is so slow that sometimes I don’t even notice when things have improved. It starts with taking a moment to acknowledge every tiny task that I complete and every small victory, no matter how insignificant it seems.
So far this week, I have:
- done all the Easter shopping, and picked up Ron’s present for his birthday next week
- sent out the invitations for Ron’s birthday party
- completed the paperwork for two health insurance claims
- cooked dinner every night (yesterday lasagna, today baked beans; still in snow-covered comfort food mode over here)
- gone a whole twenty or thirty minutes at a stretch without the theme song for The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt running through my head on a glorious auto-tuned loop
- cleaned the bathrooms
- dragged a month’s worth of recycling to the curb
- survived a very contentious meeting at the school, AND refused to back down when two older men in attendance tried to take the floor while I was talking, thank you very much
- taken four kids to the library for playtime, and talked to two moms I don’t know at all without having a total social anxiety meltdown
- caught up on some laundry and vacuuming
Some of these are pretty small, I know, but when I’m in full-on fuck me why is it still winter even simple things like filling out an insurance form make me shrivel into a little ball of sorrow and hopelessness.
I’m in no way at Peak Efficiency. The library trip was this morning and the school meeting was last night, and frankly I’m exhausted – I’m really looking forward to some time this evening to put in some earplugs and refuse all human contact.
Ask me how glad I am that I take Good Friday AND Easter Monday off. (Hint: SO GLAD.)
Is it spring where you are?